Disturbing thoughts

I wish i am sick...maybe terminal illness? At least than mommy wont need to be focussed on whatdaddy is doing and keep thinking megetivuuely. Maybe then she will appreciate us more. Just want to have some great time eating out and she can think of so mich negative things to say about it. It is not like we do not appreciate her. We just want her to rest a day not cooking and enjoy being served rather than thinking she has to sete everyone at home.  She an choose to live happily and be a happy and proud mother yet she choose to be grumpy over some little things. Maybe if I am terminally ill, then she would be distracted about all these.

Maybe then she will care for us more....rather than thinking so negatively about her life. Yes....thinking negatively.....i think this is a generation spell. I thought i was the only one...and i saw my sister...and now i know why we are all so negative about life...its all a generation curse.


Life is what you want it to be. You are what you think you are.

Why cant she understand that having us girls are already enough. Why must she think so negatively about life and then lifve in such misery???  Sre we not good enough compared to boys???

I hate boys. I hate men!!!! Wish they are all dead!!!!!

Spotify

I just got this spotify app, which I have to admit, I spotted ages ago but never bothered to figure it out. I chose 90s genre and realised how ancient I have become!

So far, I still haven't found a genre I truly enjoy...

That said, I need to listen to more songs I suppose. Widen the horizon. Life isn't all about work. Sad to say!

Faulty system

The entire system I am in is at huge time fault. The flaws are ugly. I have had so many ideas to spew in, however, I know that people will judge me then saying what do I know? Do I think I am that smart having trained in London and then try to compare what we had in the NHS to our system here?

Yes, maybe they are right. But that does not stop me from emphasising that this entire system is at fault. Maybe we are just 100 years away from the developed countries in terms of attitude, efficiency and work ethics.

Dare I not dream

When things become slightly better, I feel afraid to even be thankful.

That is how bad and pessimistic I have become.

Courage

It takes huge courage to make a decision in life. Even though we make choices and decisions every seconds in our life but all of those decisions changes our life one way or another. Wether it is a big decision like chamging jobs and field of work or just small choices of what to wear and where to go...the course of our life depends on what we decide.

Whatever that has been decided in the past, let us face it with courage today. Put in all that we have and just go on forward.

It may not be as simple as to design and order business cards and then distribute it around or redisgn it again and agaon to suit ypur taste.once it has been printed, well, that's it. You have to live with it or decideto throw the all out and make a new one.

One can change their mind and decide to make another choice in life...but it takes a bigger courage to doso and I am very amazed at those people.

Life at the lowest

This is not even halfway through and I m finding life at my lowest.. Knowing it will only get worse. How depressing it can be! I find that I am not only slow, time is running up as I try to squeeze so many impossibilities into these four short months. How dreadful it can be...

Then again, it isn't quite the time to bury or dwell in self pity. No one would ever ever make you feel better, only worse. It is a tough battle and I should remind myself, no matter what happens, I must hold on tight and survive. No matter how long it takes, it must and will be done.
No kidding, dude.

No kidding.

Your safety

I cant wait to go out shopping with Xuan tomorrow. Hehe...one shopping mall at a time. I cant decide which for tomorrow but definitely i am excited for it. I was reminded to bring papersprays! Just for our safety. Now tell me, where can i find tasers for sale?

Oh well. The trick is just to be careful. Do not park at dark alleys and always look around for suspicious people. In case of anything, do not go out late at night and do not go out alone. Always have company. That would reduce the risk of being targetted.

Huhu.

Still ant wait for my retail therapy withXuan.